Dec 13, 2013

How's That Working For Ya?


  I was thinking about my very first job the other day. My first job was as a "paperboy" for the Eugene Register-Guard. 

I started wondering what other people's first jobs were, so I did some scientific research online, courtesy of Google.

I was amazed at the first jobs people had!  Here are a few examples of first jobs:

"My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate."

"I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax."

"I was a barber, but I just couldn't cut it." 

"I was a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy."

"I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have the patients."

"I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income."

"I got a job as a historian but I realized there was no future in it" 

"I was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind."

I never worked at Starbucks or in an orange juice factory. But I have worked in offices for the majority of my career. Offices have their ups and downs.  Their biggest advantage is that they're indoors, so on the icy, cold nasty days that we've had lately, offices are generally pleasant places to work.

If you've worked in offices that are set up as the proverbial "cubicle farm",  you know that  indoor offices aren't the cushy place that people who work out in the elements think they are. Working in a cubicle is sometimes a lot like being in a prison. 

Don't believe me? Think about the following comparisons between working in an office and being in prison. In some ways, prison may look like a better deal!


At work, you spend the majority of your time in a 6’x 8’ cubicle.
In prison, you spend the majority of your time in an 8’ x 10’ cell.



In prison, you get 3 meals a day.
At work you only get a break for 1 meal. And you have to pay for it!

In prison, you get time off for good behavior.
 At work, you get rewarded for good behavior with...MORE WORK!!

In prison, there are wardens who are sick, evil, twisted, and cruel.
At work, we have. . . managers.

 If your job seems more like being in prison, it's probably time to look for another job. Call your boss and say you can’t come in to work because you’re sick. When your boss asks what’s wrong, say you have a vision problem--You can’t see yourself working for him anymore. 

It's no orange juice factory, but I like my job. Would you like to know one of the things I like best about my job? I have an eight minute commute to work. Unlike most of you, I don't have to deal with this every day:


 




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